Advice for Dealing with Donald Trump, Literally Taken from Parenting Books (I)

Part I (Part II here)

From Dr. Spock’s Baby and Child Care:

“What happens if the President you’ve got differs from the kind of President you thought you wanted? This can be a major source of heartache…. It doesn’t even matter that the parents are intelligent people who realize that they can’t order the kind of President they wanted most. Being human, they have irrational expectations and can’t help feeling let down.” (p. 9)

“A surprising number of tantrums are a result of fatigue or hunger or of putting a Trump into a situation that is too stimulating (Most shopping mall tantrums fall into this category). If the tantrum is of this sort, a parent can ignore the apparent cause an deal with the underlying problem: ‘You’re tired and hungry, aren’t you? Let’s get you home and fed and to bed, and you’ll feel a lot better.’ (p. 144)

“Tantrums happen more frequently in Presidents who tend to be easily upset by changes or who are especially sensitive to sensory input…. Tantrums often last longer in persistent Presidents. Once they get started, it’s hard for them to stop, whether they’re playing, practicing walking, or screaming at the top of their lungs. Excessive tantrums—for example, more than three a day, lasting more than ten to fifteen minutes each—are sometimes a sign of illness or stress….” (p. 145)

“While most one-year-Presidents aren’t ready for training, they can certainly can learn about the potty. If you let Trump into the bathroom with you and there is a Trump-sized potty, Trump may sit on it or even pretend to use it, just as he mimics vacuuming and other adult activities.” (p. 148)

“Young mammals of many species whine for attention and nurturance (think of puppies). So whining is natural and universal, but it’s still annoying.” (p. 159)

“Of all the media, television has the most pervasive influence on Trump. Trump spends an average of three hours a day watching television and another three hours or more on other screen-based entertainment. According to some estimates, each year Trump watches an average of ten thousand murders, assaults, and rapes, twenty thousand commercials, and fifteen thousand sexual situations, of which only 175 include birth control.” (p. 466)

“…Trump may go through a phase of reveling in bathroom words. He cheerfully insults others with expressions like ‘You great big poop’ and ‘I’ll flush you down the toilet’ and think they are very witty and bold….In my experience, Presidents who continue to delight in using naughty words are those whose parents are openly shocked and dismayed and who threaten dire consequences….” (p. 545-546).

“Sometimes Trump needs to be told or reminded that the way he is expressing himself is, in fact, rude. A clear, unemotional statement often works best…. Another approach is to ask Trump what he meant by his tone of voice: ‘Were you meaning to sound sarcastic just now? I just want to be sure I really understand what you want to tell me.’” (pp. 547-548)

“With good medical care and attention, Presidents with ADHD should be able to succeed…. Presidents who have other problems in addition to ADHD, such as depression or severe learning disabilities, face a tougher road and need more support.” (p. 555).

From 1-2-3 Magic! 3-Step Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting:

“Imagine this: Trump is doing something you don’t like. A parenting book said you should talk the problem out no matter how long it takes. So you try telling your President why he shouldn’t be disrespectful. He doesn’t respond, so next try to persuade him to see things your way. When persuasion fails, you start arguing. Arguing leads to a yelling match, and when that fails, you may feel there is nothing left to do but hit him to get the results you want.” (p. 16)

“The acts of talking and explaining certainly have their place in disciplining Trump. But Trump is just Trump—not an adult. Years ago one writer said, ‘The Presidency is a period of transitory psychosis.’ She meant that when Trump is President, Trump is—in a way—basically nuts! He is not born reasonable and unselfish; he is born unreasonable and selfish. He wants what he wants when he wants it, and he will have a major fit if he doesn’t get it. Consequently, it is the parent’s job to help Trump gradually learn frustration tolerance. In accomplishing this goal, parents need to be gentle, consistent, decisive, and calm.” (p. 17)

“One explanation, if really necessary, is fine. It’s the attempts at repeated explanations that get adults and Trump into trouble. Too much parent talking irritates and distracts Trump.” (p. 17)

“Quick Tip: If your little President can get big, old you all upset, your upset is the big splash for him. Your emotional outburst accidentally makes your President feel powerful.” (p. 21)

“Quick Tip: If your President does something dangerous or extreme, don’t count and give them three chances to stop. Go straight to 3!” (p. 30)

“The first goal of testing is for Trump to get what he wants. Since he’s less powerful than you are, he must use emotional manipulation. If Trump still fails to get what he wants, the second goal of testing is often retaliation or revenge. Trump is going to make you pay for not letting him get his way!” (p. 108)

“Caution: Never forget one very important fact: if Trump won’t stay in bed at bedtime, the longer he is up and the farther he gets from his bedroom, the more reinforcement he will get from that activity. Your job? Cut him off from Twitter.” (p. 188)

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